If you are a woman, have you ever felt that you are looked down upon by men? If you are male, are you a good man who respects women? In Chinese feudal society, men were powerful, and women had to obey them and submit to their control. According to the Chinese cultural history, there is a saying called “san cong si de”(Three obedience and Four Virtues), which becomes the women’s moral, behavior, ability and training standard. “San Cong” means that the female should obey her father before her marriage, her husband when married, and her sons in widowhood. “Si De” refers to morality, proper speech, modest manner and diligent work of women in ancient China. As a result, the spiritual fetters of the wifely submission and virtue were imposed on women in feudal society. In a word, there was sexual discrimination in the feudal society because men were always considered superior to women. Nowadays, after the long fight against sexual discrimination, Chinese women have already gained the equal possibilities and rights as male in the society. However, the sexual discrimination is still ingrained in people’s brains, and it also has affected my family and our lives from the older generation to mine.
In my family, my grandfather was influenced by the feudal thoughts mostly, so he had never tossed aside the sexual discrimination. In his opinion, sexual equality is impossible. My grandfather’s parents were born in the feudal society, so he had a feudal upbringing. My grandfather had three sons and two daughters, one of whom is my mother. He was very poor when he was young. He had to work to support his big family, and his income was the only income. He took good care of his children, but he loved his sons much more than his daughters. Consequently, my mother and my aunt couldn’t go to school because my grandfather had spent all the money on his sons’ education. Moreover, he didn’t care so much about his daughters’ marriages, especially my mother’s. He treated my mother’s marriage as a trade. He bought over her daughter and brought some money from my father as a return of raising her. That’s because her daughter had married somebody, and she didn’t belong to the member of his family for good. In other words, he believed in only the sons in his family could carry on generation. My grandfather was a headstrong person, who had never absorbed the new ideas of sexual equality.
Sexual discrimination also has brought the negative effects to my parents. My father is in the central and dominant position of my family, and my mother has to obey and listen to him. He always thinks that the man is the main and most important productive force, who can make more money than woman. In addition, man has the responsibilities to work and support the family whereas the woman has the duty to do housework and take care of the family. Therefore, my father doesn’t let my mother work outside, and he never thinks that my mother can get a good job and earn a lot of money. On the other hand, my mother seems to agree with my father. She prefers to stay at home because she thinks her only responsibility is to take care of her husband and her children. Even though her life is boring and not free, she has never complained about it. Anyway, she needs to be confident and independent. Both my parents should believe in the equality between men and women.
I oppose sexual discrimination; in fact, I feel inequitable as a daughter in my family. Even though my parents always say that they love my brother and me equally, sometimes I still feel unloved. Actually, my parents love my brother more than me. For Instance, each time I used to have an argument with my brother, my father or my mother would firstly put the blame on me. When I was a child, I complained too much about that. In contrast, now I can understand that my parents are influenced by the feudal thoughts as the most Chinese parents do, and they have made an effort to change it. They at least offer me the same living condition and education as my brother, and they have spent a lot of energy and passion raising us. I am now in America, where there is sexual equality, so I can try to get rid of the sexual discrimination. Life is better here but not perfect. I want to prove that women can be superior to the men. If I get married and have my own children, no matter boys or girls, I will love them equally. Moreover, I won’t let the sexual discrimination pass on to my next generation.
“Ladies first”, the guy said to me politely. He gave way to me, and let me get on the bus first. Nowadays, more and more men are aware that women have the same existence value as them in society. Without women, there is no love. Without mother, there is no hero. Women should be on equal terms with male in their jobs and marriages. Moreover, female should have the rights to share the social power and family responsibilities in the society with the men. In a word, female should be respected. Even though sexual discrimination hasn’t been completely eliminated in my family, I won’t let it pass down to the future generations.
In my family, my grandfather was influenced by the feudal thoughts mostly, so he had never tossed aside the sexual discrimination. In his opinion, sexual equality is impossible. My grandfather’s parents were born in the feudal society, so he had a feudal upbringing. My grandfather had three sons and two daughters, one of whom is my mother. He was very poor when he was young. He had to work to support his big family, and his income was the only income. He took good care of his children, but he loved his sons much more than his daughters. Consequently, my mother and my aunt couldn’t go to school because my grandfather had spent all the money on his sons’ education. Moreover, he didn’t care so much about his daughters’ marriages, especially my mother’s. He treated my mother’s marriage as a trade. He bought over her daughter and brought some money from my father as a return of raising her. That’s because her daughter had married somebody, and she didn’t belong to the member of his family for good. In other words, he believed in only the sons in his family could carry on generation. My grandfather was a headstrong person, who had never absorbed the new ideas of sexual equality.
Sexual discrimination also has brought the negative effects to my parents. My father is in the central and dominant position of my family, and my mother has to obey and listen to him. He always thinks that the man is the main and most important productive force, who can make more money than woman. In addition, man has the responsibilities to work and support the family whereas the woman has the duty to do housework and take care of the family. Therefore, my father doesn’t let my mother work outside, and he never thinks that my mother can get a good job and earn a lot of money. On the other hand, my mother seems to agree with my father. She prefers to stay at home because she thinks her only responsibility is to take care of her husband and her children. Even though her life is boring and not free, she has never complained about it. Anyway, she needs to be confident and independent. Both my parents should believe in the equality between men and women.
I oppose sexual discrimination; in fact, I feel inequitable as a daughter in my family. Even though my parents always say that they love my brother and me equally, sometimes I still feel unloved. Actually, my parents love my brother more than me. For Instance, each time I used to have an argument with my brother, my father or my mother would firstly put the blame on me. When I was a child, I complained too much about that. In contrast, now I can understand that my parents are influenced by the feudal thoughts as the most Chinese parents do, and they have made an effort to change it. They at least offer me the same living condition and education as my brother, and they have spent a lot of energy and passion raising us. I am now in America, where there is sexual equality, so I can try to get rid of the sexual discrimination. Life is better here but not perfect. I want to prove that women can be superior to the men. If I get married and have my own children, no matter boys or girls, I will love them equally. Moreover, I won’t let the sexual discrimination pass on to my next generation.
“Ladies first”, the guy said to me politely. He gave way to me, and let me get on the bus first. Nowadays, more and more men are aware that women have the same existence value as them in society. Without women, there is no love. Without mother, there is no hero. Women should be on equal terms with male in their jobs and marriages. Moreover, female should have the rights to share the social power and family responsibilities in the society with the men. In a word, female should be respected. Even though sexual discrimination hasn’t been completely eliminated in my family, I won’t let it pass down to the future generations.
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